LIfe camp^^

Life is so short for me~ rushing for prestiges,money and pleassure and just forgot to shoulder my cross and Follow Him.In this camp, I gain lot lot benefit in the world but i lost my soul in the process. But before things start messed up, my life was blessed by My Father tat my finacial was supported, i got a willing soulmate and i got pretiges. But there is something tat yin ying tell me that i have regreted for i have not going to the rite church.But when i got to go to register for the church i was baptised and i thought i could go to heaven and when games end. My soulmate told me tat" We're going to hell" I was so shock tat i was crushed down.. I was so blurred but when i realise. it was the Bio tech tat the mayor had required us to register is a mark of 666 which is the mark of deceiver the devil beast. I din blame my pastor for deceiving me but i blame myself for not alert to this and i had rejected HIM.At the very nite, i was asked in my mind isit any ppl u wish they are here?"Yes,Michelle" Well i really wanna tell her that she had miss this.And she was just in my mind this whole camp.After the shermon, i felt so bad that i couldnt stand up and said "Yes lord i wanna share ur gospel" and i just sat there sat sorry Lord im not prepared.. I cant sleep for tat nite, when all the scene when Jesus suffer the whipping,kicking,Stoning, scracthing and even a Long sharp rose thorn Crown on His head.And He 's nailing on the cross run into my mind. I broke into tears tat i couldnt help him in his will of His father to save ppl to my Lord.I really wan share this to Michelle,but i really dono how.. and i am very down even now.